The award-winning actress admitted she is still struggling with accepting he is no longer here with us.
“I still can’t make sense of it,” she wrote.
Read her beautifully written tribute below.
My brother, my heart hurts so. A part of my brain refuses to accept it…shitty part about grief-it goes in stages. For me, it started w/ denial. When @jakesmollett called to tell me, my brain went “hell naw that’s not true, let me call Michael.”And I called him. I called him over & over until my brain said stop, he’s gone.
I couldn’t breathe. Taken awhile for my brain to metabolize how the world can continue to spin w/out him here in the physical form. He was supposed to be here with us this week in LA for the Emmys. He was supposed to see how big Hunter is, we were gonna dance, celebrate, cry. Instead our brother was laid to rest today. I still can’t make sense of it. Perhaps it’s selfish of me to want to hold onto this beautiful man that came into my life & forever changed it…
One of the first scenes I did w/ @bkbmg was in episode 2 of @lovecrafthbo, Uncle George’s death. We were racing the clock, losing sun, it was a long steady-cam shot, which began w/ me running into Jonathan/Atticus’ arms. In an attempt to quiet the chaos, I looked at Michael/ MONTROSE, in the backseat of Woody, holding Uncle George in his arms, I could feel the pain held behind his eyes, my soul understood it. Thats the beauty of MKW’s instrument- he threw his entire being into each moment w/ such bravery and sacrifice. Thats all I needed…simply look in Michael/ Montrose’s eyes.
After finishing the scene, Courtney came over, held Jonathan, Michael & I as we cried in each other’s arms like babies…No, like the sons & daughter of such familiar, profound paternal grief. We became the three musketeers afterwards. Our souls tied. We joked that we had a trans-physical connection.
I can hear your voice now giving me another pep talk, “J, get up, don’t you know you’re a f**king Queen!” I’ll miss you when I listen to @raphael_saadiq Jimmy Lee, or hear @deepakchopra 21-day meditations, or when I try that one yoga pose you gave me tips on…your soft, baritone voice saying “Hey Kiddo.” …I take comfort in knowing that you’re finally free, somewhere dancing, being mighty, showing the angels how to really get it. Btw-You still owe me that dance…& our Bulls Jerseys. I love you #ripmichaelkwilliams
See Jurnee’s original post below.
Beautifully stated, Jurnee Smollett.
My sincerest condolences and prayers to all who loved Michael K. Williams.
May he rest in peace.