UPDATE: I am pleased to report Chika is okay.
The rapper took to social media on Sunday and tweeted:
alive. wanna go home.
leaving the hospital. not that i should care about updating anyone besides family. i just wanna be left alone, if that’s okay. i appreciate the prayers and stuff. thanks.
See her original tweets below.
Please keep her uplifted in prayer while she gets the help and healing she needs.
Read the original post below.
Chika took to social media and shared severely alarming posts where she implied she planned to take her own life.
The rapper and actor has been very transparent about her mental health challenges and she has shared alarming posts in the past, but this one feels even scarier than her previous cries for help.
According to her tweets, Chika was on a flight and she was having a very hard time dealing with her anxiety.
She wrote:
like i deadass wanna die rn. not even being hyperbolic. i’d be so relieved if my heart just stopped.
i really should’ve taken a xanax before this flight. i don’t know what’s wrong but i can’t sleep and my anxiety is through the roof rn. and nobody’s up.
i’ve been having a silent panic attack for 2 hours pls excuse my tweets i need to let it out or i will actually lose it on this flight & i refuse to be that person
im stuck on a flight to a place where i will be alone and i cannot breathe or sleep and everyone is trying to rest
bye
Then, she took to Instagram and shared a lengthy and extremely alarming post where she wrote:
I went to the top of the intercontinental, but could not jump. Not because I don’t want to, but because the metal stairs were scary.
That’s the thing about having a f**ked up brain. No matter how much pain you are in, there will always be something to hold you back, I know you guys are tired of me holding back.
It’s draining & sad. It looks like crying wolf. But it is not. It’s just difficult to find the right way. The quickest way. The painless way. I am tired of myself, too.
I don’t need anyone feeling bad for worried bc I failed the last time I tried. Save your emotions for when I succeed. It will be the first time I got what I wanted in its entirety.
The first time I’ll be okay having no help. The one thing I was capable of doing on my own. I think I am supposed to be a cautionary tale of sorts.
What happened when no one listens. What happens when you think people are too capable to fail.
We have icarus and we have me. One flew too close to the sun & one couldn’t even conquer metal stairs only 20 feet away from eternal freedom.
I will find that freedom somehow today.
I am not sorry to let people down. I refuse to die carrying the burdens of people who could not share my own. I refuse to take this pressure to the grave. I refuse to continue to deceive myself into believing things are meant to get better.
I knew everything in my life before it happened. Ask my mom and dad. They heard me predict my life. I was not wrong and I am still not wrong. I am not speaking things into existence, I am speaking of what already exists. The story. The narrative. The ebbs and flows. The saga. I was never meant to win. I was meant to show someone else they can.
I do not forgive anyone, and I do not want anyone to forgive me. Except my best friend Cole & my immediate family. Mom, dad, sisters, that’s it. They shouldn’t have to hurt when remembering me. That really f**king sucks and I’m a piece of sh*t for that.
I know it but my hurting matters top, even if only to me. Thank you to the nice lady in MN who gave me a hug.
That kindness and selflessness is needed in the world. You’re someone’s angel. You’re going to save someone’s life.
Just not mine.
No more typing. I’m going to finish my drinking find a way that works
Thanks for the ride. I hated it.
See the original post below.
Police conducted a welfare check on Chika at her North Hollywood apartment, but she wasn’t there.
There has been an outpouring of concern, love, and prayers for Chika on social media.
I pray she is okay.
If you or someone you know is thinking of suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-TALK.
